My attraction toward guys

I don’t normally date guys…anymore. I will get VERY friendly with them, though…Like, I went on a trip with a group I’m in. 5 hour bus ride. And me and this one guy (who is 15 and very ticklish) I tickled him…and he was like, totally fine with it, besides the joking “nigga, naw, Ima fight you, and Ima cut you up” he says this in the most ghettoooo voice possible. And he’s the whitest kid I know. I’m not trying to be racist, but I don’t know how else to describe how he said it. <3. And then he tickled me. And this other guy, who’s 16, kept tickling me. And he isn’t ticklish. But he has pressure points. Sucks for him, right?! XP. 

Anyway, on to how I don’t like guys. I get bored with them. I’m sorry that sounded horrid….but pretty much yea. I like the physical part, because guys are really touch feely. And so am I. So I like putting my legs on their lap, hugging them, putting my head on their lap, jabbing them in the stomach, etc. But, when I date a guy, it doesn’t last long. Maybe 3 weeks, then I just don’t like them. I’m not sure why. But when I date girls, it lasts forever. And I love them, soooo much. Always. So I don’t want to date guys. Because then I lose them as friends. I’m an ass, right? No. Nigga naw.

What I think about the friend zone-People who friend zone guys aren’t asses. Same with guys who friend zone girls. It’s not their fault they are not attracted to the other person. I think of guys I like as friends, nothing more. Just more touchy feely friends, for the physical side I don’t have right now. It works for them, it works for me. Because most of these guys? Yea. They are like 15-16. And im 13, so I don’t have a chance at first. And they all know I’m gay to begin with.  I find it weird I figured this out this morning…but yea. So I cuddle with guys, hang with them, but I have no emotional feelings for them, besides cuddle interests. Not love interests.

So yea. I figured out I’m gay! Sorry for keeping you waiting. And according to my friend, who gender swaps a lot, im very gender fluid. IM SO FREAKIN HAPPY!! Cuz, now I can present myself in public as a guy, and most people believe me!! ❤ yaaaay.


Side note-When I say things like nigga naw, I’m not using it in an offensive way. If you took it that way, I apologize immeadiatly, as it can be a touchy term for some people. I was mocking the way my friend said it, who mocks the way people at his school say it. So I’m very sorry if you took it in an offensive way. Love you, bye ❤


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